Adopting the custom of the European duellists of old, the Graeme Helgram stable as challengers gave the right of choice for weapons to their opponent – in this case a Gladiator from the Celia Gray stable. The result was to most eyes a damning condemnation of the levels of mediocrity that have invaded our beloved sport.

Rapiers were chosen, and from the outset it was clear that our two combatants were grossly mismatched. Tiberius Gau weighing in at 22 stone, 6 foot 6 tall, and from the look of his loincloth, he clearly had big hands. It’s a shame he hadn’t spent much time holding a rapier with them.

Having staked her claim to the centre of the arena, Mathilda! simply waited for Tiberius to complete his demonstration of futility, as he launched attack after attack against a seemingly untroubled defence. Time and energy were not on his side, and perhaps he spent a little too much of the night before celebrating the fact that he had previously been undefeated. Considering the way he was turned back like the tide against high cliffs, we have seen a clear illustration that skill and technique have not previously needed to form part of the arsenal of a winning Gladiator.

Eventually, like a clock winding down, Tiberius slowed, and it was with almost disdainful air that Mathilda! relieved him of his sword arm at the elbow, before also slashing his right thigh to the bone. With game over, the healers rushed on in time to save Tiberius life, but his reputation and record will forever live in the minds of this week’s crowd as a bumbling fool, for whom the only question left is whether he will be fit enough to stay alive when he must next appear in three months time.

In her opening appearance at the Casablanca arena, Mathilda! successfully survived her lunch date with the lions.

The 26 new gladiators were herded out onto the sands from the north gate, and the first glimpse of our girl perhaps gives us a pointer as to the style of gladiator she will be – with body paint and hair that some would describe as a cross between Xena Warrior Princess and Loana from ‘One million years BC’, she strutted forth with arrogance and pride.

The lions, as usual, were sent in from the south, and that three hundred yards of distance between life and death once again caused confusion and panic in the new fighters. Testimony varies depending where in the stands you were sitting – clearly the group were spread as they had decided that they didn’t need to be the fastest fighter in the Arena to survive, simply not being one of the slowest would probably do it, but somewhere along the lines, the two fighters nearest Mathilda! lost their footing, and the male lion, always keen to avoid expending effort, took the hindmost.

Nobody interferes with the male lion while he eats, and as confusion and carnage reigned in the rest of the arena, our girl quietly seemed to almost be standing guard on her pet lion as it ate it’s fill. Thus ended the inaugural appearance of Mathilda!

Final score – 26 people went in, 14 people walked out, and two people were carried out alive but with significant injuries. 6 lions went in, 6 lions came out again. A usual Saturday feeding.

Casablanca and the External Empire now have their own entries on the ‘Empire‘ button of the main site.

Hi all,

I feel a need to say a few things about role play. Particularly about role playing disagreements. It’s not easy.

In a face to face game, arguments can make for hugely intense sessions. But not everybody copes with that level of intensity well. Nevertheless, when you’re actually there, you have all the behavioural and visual clues as to whether it is still just a game or whether lines are being crossed. Also – there’s a bunch of other players there and a GM to help moderate, so that things usually don’t go off the rails. Sometimes it happens, but it’s relatively rare.

On e-mail, wikis and forums, none of that happens. You can’t see the other person. You have nobody else there. Very often the words written can be read multiple ways. When the sparks start flying, there’s a big chance that the way you read something was quite different from what the person writing it meant. You get caught up in it, and read something that lights a fuse, and hit reply immediately to blast off a response and suddenly – there’s a thread twenty messages deep and people who used to be friends are starting to not be friends any more.

I say it a lot, and I’ll keep on saying it because it keeps on needing to be said. My golden rule for electronic gaming – NEVER reply to anything that actually makes you angry the same day it arrives. It’s that simple. Take a day. Take the heat out of it. Have time to think about it and if you give it time, you have a chance to wind down the aggression. The GM and the other players have a chance to actually get in and perhaps help defuse things.

Same rule is well worth applying in real life e-mail too. It does no harm to step back and wait rather than blasting off a reply. 95% of the flame wars I have ever seen on newsgroups, forums or anywhere have usually been lit, smouldered and exploded within a 12 hour period.

Just slow it down. It’s a game. It’s supposed to be fun. It’s definitely not worth risking losing friends over.

[End GM Soapbox]